Hello.

Untitled.

Sebab post ni akan bercampur aduk. At first, we wanted to buy a walker for rayyan. But hubs did a lot of research suddenly dia kata tak payah la beli walker untuk rayyan, kita buat playroom untuk dia. -_______-

Mama dah excited nak beli walker, abah pulak kata tak payah. Abah kata biar development rayyan walks naturally bukan dipaksa. Oh well, I personally think bukan nak force. At least bila anak dlm walker I can monitor him from kitchen. Kang tau tau dah bawah kerusi. Lepastu melalak sebab tak reti nak keluar. Hahaha. Masuk reti, keluar tak reti. But since hubs say NO, so mengikut je lah mama ni. Kang derhaka plak kalau protest.

Again, walker ni subjective pada parents. If beli, beli yang safety dia okey and bla bla bla. Mama nak beli FP Jumperoo abah kata nanti rayyan pakai kejap. Kan nanti re-use balik untuk adik rayyan. Ape la abah ni. :p

Sabtu lepas, gigihlah abah cari playmat yang puzzle dekat tesco. Tesco is cheaper than carrefour (going to change to AEON Big). Nak ball yg kecik kecik tu, abah beli. Cuma fence je abah tak jumpa lagi. Abah kata yg kedai baby semua harga merepek. Sampai 500++. Mama layankan aje ape abah nak buat utk anak dia. Sampai ke tesco nilai mama ikut abah. So sekarang, terpaksa lah mama masak sambil curi curi tengok apa anak mama buat. -______________________-

Second. Car seat. Yes. Car seat lama tu kamu dah tak nak duduk. Bila letak je terangkat bontot nak keluar. So mama bungkus car seat tu letak kat rumah tok bu. Now, we need to find a new car seat for you. Yang bungkus tu nanti pakai balik untuk 'adik' kamu nanti ye. Abah tak suka spend mahal mahal for a thing yang we dont know you'll utilize it or not. So, here again, we decided to buy you a new car seat from sweet cherry. Price wise pun okey. Below RM 200. Dah try test dekat Manjaku hari tu and we personally think you like this!

Child Booster Seat

Abah kata nampak style. -_________-

Weekend ni kita beli ye anak. Mama lenguh tangan nak kene riba kamu dalam kereta kalau tido. So far mama mmg berpuas hati car seat yang di beli brand sweet cherry ni. Stroller pulak abah dan mama berpuas hati pakai halford. Senang. 

Third. Mama ingin mencari swim suit untuk kamu. Pelampung dah beli. Siap ada steering lagi. Mama tak sabar nak tunggu 22nd March ni. Our first holiday. Doesnt mind walaupun di Melaka sahaja yang penting hotel pun free. Avillion Legacy. Walaupuuuuuun orang kata hotel tu hotel lama, we dont mind. Its FREE. Kalau ada unsur jeles mmg begitu kot. lol. Its an advance birthday gift from tokbu for mama and abah (we born in March!). So, abah excited sangat ingatkan weekend haritu patut pergi Melaka. Abah kata tak payah swim suit. Tapi mama nak jugak beli. Mana nak beli swim suit for baby online yer? Care to share? Pampers huggies tu mana nak cari? Manjaku nan hado. Tesco pn takdak. Abah kata tak payah pakai pampers. -_________________-

Kalau tiba tiba rayyan poo poo? 

Early May jalan jalan pergi JB. Before mama start teaching and class, haruslah cuti sakan. Nanti weekend mama ada class. Weekdays teaching. Berulang kali mama consider and re consider to teach. Bila tok ayah kata mbak siti jaga rayyan bulan 5 ni. Mama rasa legaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa. Its hard to find orang yg betul2 boleh jaga anak. Nak hantar nursery kat putrajaya ni, famous dgn kes tak berdaftar lah. Bayi mati tersedak susu, kena dera lah. Bla bla bla. So mama malas dah nak search and find. Next year tok ayah sendiri nak jaga rayyan and mama rasa should be okey lah since rayyan dah besar. Can walk insyaAllah. Can talk and understand. So tak susah mana tok ayah nak layan kerenah kamu nanti. 

Just want to share this group in FB. Honestly, membantu lah jugak. They share what they know from their experience. So now, mama letak olive oil dgn habbatussauda sikit dlm bubur rayyan. Takde sembelit dah.  Before this 2 hari rayyan tak poo poo. Maybe texture bubur tu mama buat solid sgt kot. Heee. Ampun. Lepas ni kita cari badam dan raisins okey! Mama tak bagi salmon pun, tapi mama letak ikan tenggiri and so far you have no allergy. Ikan tu mama goreng dulu kang main campak dlm bubur hanyir plak. Mostly mama masak untuk rayyan ikut resepi orang dulu dulu. Abah kata, dulu abah tak makan salmon tapi abah cerdik je. -______________________- 

Ok. Bye.

Jealousy

Hello.

We had our playtime and abah came in and hug me. Just to tease you, abah said "abah syg mama. bwekk"

and you response "herghhh herghhh" *screamingggggg*. protes marah la tu kononnya.

Oh my son, how to give you adik? If ada adik nnt mesti jeles. We need to prepare you to be a brother next year.

Somehow, its funny bila ingat balik. HAHA. Keshiaaann anak mama.

Judgemental

Hello.

Judgemental - A value judgment is a judgment of the rightness or wrongness of something, or of the usefulness of something, based on a personal view....

Tak salah kalau kita nk ada tanggapan pada orang lain tapi biarlah berasas dan sekurang kurangnya kita kenal orang tu daripada tak kenal tapi main hentam je orang tu. Ewahhhh.

Speaking of my future career, still undecided to be a lecturer or back to the technical field. Honestly, nak mengajar anak orang bukan mudah. Tambah kalau level IPT. Tambah lagi kalau IPTS. Ha ha. Students pay higher than IPTA's fee. Based from my experiences, I am not a top student not also a bad student. Lebih kurang average je level aku. 

Dulu, kalau nak register class waktu add and drop session mesti akan refer senior lecturer mana yang ok untuk subject ni and ni. So berebutlah register class tu ikut time slot. Bertenggek depan laptop tak sabar nak register class yang lecturer ok. Why? Sebab as a student, semua nak score subject tu. Bayo fees mahal, kang masuk class yang lecturer tak ok, sekali fail dah seksa nak repeat pastu baya sendiri. Sponsorship kalau repeat mepeat ni memang tak akan tolong bayarkan. 

Walhal, basically, semua orang tau lecturer yang mengajar tu macam pemangkin sahaja. The rest are up to you. Ko nak belajar ke tak nak belajar ke itu sendiri mahu ingat. Ko nak ponteng kelas 1-2 kali which is allowable for you to sit for the exam pun tak kisah. Jangan over limit dah la. Zaman aku dulu, siap kira dgn member2 dah brape kali ponteng lecture tu ini. Hahaha. Kang tak boleh amek final exam, universiti hantar surat kat mak bapak ape aku nk jawab dengan parents aku? Hahaha. 

Ini pandangan aku lah yang dulu pernah jadi student undergrad, register class yang lecturer okey akan menambahkan lagi semangat untuk score subject tu. Bila pergi class tak ngantuk, tak boring, bila time dh dekat untuk pergi class tu rasa mcm tak nak skip class. Haa macam tu. So lecturer memainkan peranan di situ untuk menarik minat students. 

2nd, bila pergi class aku nak senang faham. Tak nak pergi class, lepas tu lecturer sebut sebutir sebutir mcm dalam text book. Haaa dulu ada ye lecturer aku mcm tu. Sampai ke sudah aku tak suka subject tu. Sudahnya bila kerja pun dapat bidang tu. Haa so jangan sumpah seranah lecturer. Kelak makan diri. Ha ha ha. Itu aku la. Kawan kawan aku tak de plak. Nasib aku la kan. LOL. Lecturer pulak berbeza beza setiap orang and method of teaching mereka. Why?

Pendapat aku lagi. IF lecturer tu ada working experiences and taught a class yang dia boleh relatekan dengan technical field, students akan senang faham and will be more interested. Berbeza dengan lecturer yang nan hado technical experiences. Sangat berbeza. Dont judge me. Aku cakap based from experiences aku sebagai student di sebuah IPT. Bila pergi class yang orang tak ada technical experiences aku cepat bosan. Including unimate aku. Kami akui benda itu. Bila pergi class yang mereka import from GLC staff, ktorg berkobar kobar nak dengar cerita dia but at the same time, dia relatekan dengan topik subject tu. Its easy.

Kena faham, students ni otak mereka tak semua sama. Ada yang fast learner. Ada yang slow learner. Ada yang boleh imagine. Ada yang jenis kene tengok visual. So dont expect all your students are same. PALING PENTING, jangan membezakan students. Haaaaa, ini pengalaman iols. Cerita benar. Aku dgn kawan kawan aku students yang average. Pointer pun average. So ada 1 lecturer suka melebihkan students lelaki drpd students perempuan. Heh with reason, I dulu zaman belajar lagi suka kawan dengan lelaki. Ni I tengok korang dengan geng geng korang je. So what? Yang students lelaki tu rajin sgt ke? Rajin COPY PASTE ye lah. Emo plak aku igt zaman dedolu.

And, my SV for degree fyp. Students yang pointer 3 and above is different dengan below 3. (Memang lah, pointer je dah lain. Pfffft.) Students pointer 3 above is more independent, can survive bla bla bla bla. IS IT? Then apehal member aku sampai skrg dok stuck keje kt GLC tu je. Interview company gah2 semua dah pergi. BUT? Rezeki.

Kawan aku pointer paras hidung. 2.05 je!! Now, he's proudly working with MNC O&G company. LECTURER jangan bersikap terlalu prejudis terhadap students. And dont simply say what you want to say to students. Because you'll eat your words. Sorry, aku memang tak suka lecturer jenis mcm ni. Beza bezakan students is not your right. Kena ingat lah, rezeki masing masing Allah dah tentukan.

Kadang kadang, dkt IPT dia nampak main main, malas, pointer pun paras hidung. But have you seen their other side? Kebolehan lain yang mereka ada compared what you see with your naked eyes? Dont get me wrong, tak semua lecturer mcm tu. Segelintir sahaja. Tapi sikap mcm ni boleh buat students demoralized.

Kalau aku igt balik zaman fyp degree, aku mcm nak mati buat coding sendiri. Kawan aku awal2 hampeh, pemalas. Bila present fyp, dia punya lagi canggih drpd aku. Dia amek drpd internet, then dia edit. Lelaki, ada kelebihan suka menggunakan apa yg ada dpn mata. I dont blame him. Tapi aku kecewa dgn SV aku sebab dia puji kwn aku without knowing yang kwn aku tu curik drpd internet. Until now, if aku jumpa ex SV aku, I'll just ignore. Yeah. Kenangan pahit masih segar di ingatan. 

And I proudly say, I work, I gain experiences from technical field, I learnt which is apa yang aku belajar kt IPT ni hanya 10% je aku boleh relatekan dengan kerja. The rest? Learn new things. So IF aku jadi lecturer one day, ingin aku jadikan my ex lecturer sbg idolaku. He's a lecturer at the same time he's a sr engineer. Memanjang cool. Lelaki mmg sentiasa cool kan unlike women. Haha. If during test, we can discuss though he knew but he said 'jangan bagi sy nampak' then he laugh. Final exam, he let us write any thing especially formulas in a paper that we can bring to exam hall. Pandai2 ko lah nak gunakan sehelai A4 paper tu tulis byk mana ko nak. If dalam exam ada tanya soalan yang jawapan ko dh tulis dlm formula sheet tu, lucky you.

So no need to be strict. IPT okey. IPT. I repeat. IPT. Especially IPTS. We pay you more. Takkan nak FAIL kot. Hahaha itu ayat kawan aku masa dolu dolu. Students skrg lagi hebakkkkk. Sikit sikit VC. Zaman aku dulu setakat Dean je. Akhir kata, jangan lah suka sangat nak menilai students. See yourself first. Semua sama. Beza pangkat, umur dan harta. Rezeki masing masing Allah dah tentukan. Nasib baik SV utk master aku bukanlah orang mcm tu. She doesnt have any technical experiences tapi dia humble. See, tak semua lecturer macam tu kan. Tu pasal aku cakap segelintir sahaja.

PERINGATAN untuk diri sendiri. Ni yang rasa malas nak enroll lab next semester ni. Kang semua aku bagi A, ape nak jawab kat Dean? 

SEKIAN, nukilan ikhlas dari student postgrad yang pernah jadi undergrad student yang tak suka lecturer membeza bezakan students.

SEKIANNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN.

My Worries

Hello.

I kept thinking these and that. All matters keep lingering in my mind. And I dont know which I should focus first.

My Master. Yes. I had this feeling telling me that I'm going to extend a year. That's it. I'll make sure by end of 2013 I'll have my viva. And, I need to get back to work. To be in academic line or back to industrial line? Kadang kadang rindu dengan kerja yang lasak dan mencabar. I was in high voltage engineering background for almost 3 years and now I let myself rest from those field to focus on my family and master.

Susah okey nak re-coding c programming ni. Kadang-kadang rasa nak convert from research to coursework. It is not easy to focus for research if you have a child and family need to take care of. Actually aku je la kot yg rasa susah. Maybe low determination. Orang lain elok je. But nak sambung ke PhD is a NO. Not now. But if in academic line with Master qualification, memang tak naik la jawatan dan gred. Pening kan fikir pasal future with money to fork out for living expenses. If only daun dkt pokok boleh di jadikan duit. Petik je kat mana2 pokok. Dreamingggggggggg.

2nd. My son. Someone is going to take care of him bulan 5 ni. I dont know how should I response to this.? Happy? Ok lah, at least boleh pergi office everyday and settle things faster than usual. Sad? Yes. Sebab all this while since he's born, aku yang jaga dia sampai lah dia nak masuk 8 bln ni. Even nak pergi office yang aku boleh balik awal as I wish when but still, I can't stop thinking of my son for every seconds! Abah dia kata, mama saja propa padahal ar rayyan okey je if we left him with my mom & dad. IF we leave him dgn my parents of course I am not worry that much lah. But with someone yang Im not really close memang risau. Tambah pulak ar rayyan dah makin banyak perangai. Kadang-kadang dia merengek with no reasons. If pandai amek hati dia, diam lah dia, gelak tawa je. Kdg2 dia mengamuk sampai kan rasa letih nk take over. I dont know tahap mana sabar org tu dengan ar rayyan nanti. Hope she can handles my dearly son.

Or maybe I just think too much sampaikan rasa nk stop master and need to get a new job BUT dah halfway dah mak jemah oi. Bak kata lisa, master can wait. Anak cannot wait. Yes true. Tapiiiiiiiii, if my master wait for me for a long time, my allowance ada limit. Lepas tu? Huhuhuhuhuhu. Think! Think! Bumi Allah ni luas untuk cari rezeki.

Ok lah. Cukup2 lah tu.

7 months

Hello.

Hmm how time fliest fast. Tau2 anak sendiri dah 7 bulan. Lagi 5 bulan dah 1 tahun. Oh anak, cpt benar kamu membesar sampaikan mama rasa nak pause masa supaya kamu tak besar. Maintain baby je. lol.

7 months

• You can crawl few steps tapi reverse. Still reverse. Belum masuk gear D lagi.
• Texture makanan mama dah lainkan. You love rice more than anything. Perut mcm abah! 
• Your weight is 9 kg +. 
• Still breastfeeding on demand. Mama akan keep bf selagi rezeki untuk rayyan ada. What to do, you reject bottle and FM and we (mama & abah ) are so tired to keep on trying, so we decided to rest a while and let you enjoy your mama's milk.
• You can say mamma, abbbbaaaa, and mammmmammmm. So now we know, when do you want to eat.
• Makin banyak akal. You dont really like toys that much. Jimat duit mama & abah.
• Kalau pergi kedai makan, you'll scream like no one is around. -__________________-
• Kalau tgk 613, you'll laugh out loud and you'll scream out of sudden.
• Kalau someone is blocking him from watching his fav tv, he'll scream (marah la tu. abah dia pernah kena. sampai merajuk. hehe)
• Kalau tido malam, dah pandai golek ke kiri ke kanan nak siapa dodoikan. Of course lah abah dia. Mama time dia nak nenen je. Dah sudah df dia akan pusing kiri kanan cari abah untuk dodoikan. Daddykin sungguh! 
• Kalau makan, dah pandai nak makan sendiri. Taknak mama suap. Amboiiii, besar sgt dah ke? And now, I train him for a sippy cup. Dia tak pandai sedut lagi so nak bagi straw pun belum masanya lagi.
• You can sit unsupported.
• Baju semua dah size 1T. No more yang size months2 ni. Tsk.
• Kalau masuk kereta, suka duduk mcm org besar. Tak nak duduk dalam car seat bagai. -__________-
• Sekarang, abah dia train solat berjemaah. Haha. Walaupun kene paksa duduk dalam bumbo seat. We noticed bila ktorg solat, dia akan duduk diam. Tengok setiap gerak geri apa mama dgn abah dia buat. Bila dah sudah solat, pandang dia, dia akan senyum. Cair hati mama tau! So abah decided to train you. Nanti jadi imam untuk mama dgn abah ye syg. Bila mama dgn abah kembali kepada Allah, jadi imam untuk solat jenazah kami yer arrayyan!
• Sekarang abah train rayyan rajin tgk abah main rugby. -______________- mama rasa terseksa jiwa dan raga bila tgk org kene hempap. 
• You eat 3 times a day. 
• Letak dalam highchair, bagi mainan semua campak ke luar. If pergi kedai, lagi kuat dia main campak-campak. Arrayyyyyyannnnnnnnn. Banyak akal! :)

Apa yang mama ingat, mama jot down dalam blog. Al maklum lah, urat banyak putus. If mama lupa, kan ke sedih tak dapat ingat moments anak mama membesar. 

Its fun bila dapat memasak untuk anak. Keep on google and try new recipes. But aku bukanlah mama yang terlalu fanatik sampai nak bagi anak makan benda yg instant pun tak boleh. Bought for him Heinz punya biscuits yang cair dlm mulut tu. Kalau dibancuh dengan air dia tak nak. So belikan yang fingers tu, apple flavor bukan main dia hisap sampai gigit pakai gusi. Pastu tersedak sebab gelojoh. Ahaila rayyan.Lepas ni mama nak belikan bites yang biskut beras tu pulak. At least, kalau tak sempat nak masak untuk anak bila nak keluar pergi jalan, boleh la bawak bekal biskut tu kan. So time kita makan at least dia pun boleh makan. Tak kisah lah hisap then campak.

Even a friend of mine ada nasihatkan suruh masak then ltk dlm fridge then panaskan, unfortunately my son tak nak. Yes, he's a bit fussy. Nak makan yang fresh je. So, nak bagi biscuits Heinz yg beli tu pn its okey for me. As long as dia tak makan racun dah la. I dont want to be a fussy mommy. Kadang-kadang time breakfast I feed him Cerelac oat yang ada prune tu. Since right now Im not feeling well, still flu and cough, so tak larat nak masak, bancuh dgn air panas je. Bukan malas ye. Tapi keadaan kesihatan tidak mengizinkan. Unless you have a maid then itu belakang kira lah weh. In my case, I dont mind. Takkan nak suruh husband pagi-pagi bersilat kt dapur kan. Nanti dia dah besar sikit lagi mcm2 dia amek masukkan dalam mulut yang sometimes kita tak nampak. We cant control them every seconds kan. So, I let myself be a chill and relax mommy. 

Ayam, ikan semua dia dah makan. Daging je belum. Will try that later. 

So far itu je lah yang mama larat nak type.